Oooooffff!

Whilst in Hamleys two years ago at Christmas time, my son, who was 2 at the time, was marvelling at the Scalextric display that was going on. Two youngsters were playing on it, powering their cars round the huge circuit. During the final lap the cars were neck and neck, but unfortunately Jake reached over and picked the Audi TT up off the track as it came by, and stared at it intently in his hand, thus enabling the miniature Renault rally car through to take the chequered flag.

Whoops. I walked over, took the car off him and put it back on the race track. I also lifted the nipper up in the crowded store to move him away from the track, to prevent further audience participation in the race. Of course, this was the end of the world to a 2 year old, and a tantrum ensued. As I held him up, Jake flailed away with his arms and legs, and unfortunately one leg swung up and caught me flush in the nuts.

I realised I had about a two second time window before this was going to be agony so I beckoned my mum over, placed Jake gently down on the floor smiling, before collapsing in a heap the middle of the shop. Security thought I had suffered some kind of heart attack and rushed over telling the other shoppers to “give him space”. Fortunately, I was able to communicate my predicament my pointing at my nads and grunting, and after about 20 seconds I was able to crawl behind the Subbutteo counter to suffer in private.

I had a similar rush of pain in the cash game at the International last night. I sat down with £100 after the tournament (which I will blog later) and built my stack up to £700 over about five hours. The highlight of the table was the war between the Baron, and some other guy who were raising and re-raising blind regularly. I generated a fair proportion of my chips simply jamming AJ/AQ and the like after they had put £30 in the pot without looking.

I was just about to leave, when this hand comes up.

UTG makes it £5, I make it £20 next to act with QQ. Crazy man calls blind from the big blind with a stack of £900 and UTG folds.

Flop arrives 5,7,8 rainbow.

Crazy man bets £30 blind. I decide to put an end to this nonsense and hoover up the £70 by moving all in for my £700.

He checks one card…then the other.

“Oh, I call”

He has 46 for the flopping straight. I feel like I am on the floor again in Hamleys.